When I was a little girl I never imagined or dreamt about my wedding. I never thought about a huge white puffy dress, the long walk down the aisle, and the momentous flower arrangements for the chapel and reception. I never thought I would ultimately get married, and I NEVER thought I would get married young. This leaves me in a really awkward position because I am planning my wedding, and unlike a lot of other ladies I don’t have a foolproof blueprint in my head! I have not found a dress, bridesmaid’s dresses, chapel, priest, videographer, flowers, décor… the list just goes on, it almost seems like it is never ending…
I think my biggest problem is the dress. The wedding is less than 7 months away and the panic is slowly starting to set in. the problem is that I don’t know what I want, but the list of what I don’t want almost seems never ending. The added problem is that the list of what I don’t want is what is mostly in stores and I am battling to find anything in stores.
My fiancés is the most wonderful man I have ever met and we want to get married more than anything, we talk about everything but when it comes the actually wedding talk (the planning) we battle to find solutions to our extremely large amount of problems, we then think that a glass of wine would help the solution solving and we end up drinking the entire bottle (just to let you all know, a bottle of wine does not go off once open, something I just found out!)
So basically here I am, writing this blog with a glass of wine in hand (hmmm, is there a pattern??) and wondering how on earth I am going to get this wedding together? I’ll keep you posted!
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Hey Mizz Sunflower
Dont stress! I also didnt know what I wanted and had a gazillion thoughts in my mind. As soon as we saw our venue though I had my idea. Talking to the florist also helps a lot, to put things into perspecive for you :)
And dont worry about your dress, your mom will make a beautiful dress Im sure. My dress was made (also by my mom) in Greece, and the FIRST time I saw it was just 2 weeks (14 days) before the wedding. All i had send my mom was my measurements and when i saw it and tried it on it was just perfect.
Its funny how weddings turn out to be so amazing, dont let silly things bug you. Just check out some ideas in bridal magazines and online and decide what you want.
Maybe our buzzing bloggers can give you a hand? I sure dont mind. Tell us what colours you have in mind and the type of “scene” you want and well throw in some suggestions to make life a little easier for you.
have you seen our inspriation boards ()?
I know what you mean about finding everything you DON’T want at bridal shops! I found that a lot too. I really wanted to try on some classic mermaid style gowns, and there were barely any, and what there was was UGLY. I’d recommend hunting online at Brides.com, Maggie Sottero, Casablanca, Mary’s Bridal, David’s Bridal - all the big “names” - and trying to find out what you DO like. Then you can go from there…maybe get it made if you can’t find it in a shop.
Where do you live? If you live in the JHB area I can give you some names for a few things - though I didn’t get too big a “shortlist” except with the photographer!
Dearest Mizz Sunflower,
I thought I was alone. I never, ever dreamt of my wedding day. It was so unimportant to me. I did not have a vision, I did not have any ideas… well now I have a husband, 3 kids AND a wedding planning company - go figure!
Usually, the excitement of your engagement gets coupled with anxiety. Everyone asks you where you going to get married, what is your dress going to look like, have you thought of the colours… You are wise to feel apprehensive about making big choices. After all, a wrong choice may restrict your further planning. and you do not want to paint yourself into the corner!
I urge you to step back, close your eyes, take a few deep breaths and let your imagination take over…
Can you see yourself in a wedding dress… do you get a snippet of colour? Think if it as a meditation ;)
If nothing comes through… take a piece of paper and draw a line. One side is for you and the other side is for your groom. Now write down adjectives, nouns, verbs that describe you individually and as a couple… what are your interests? hobbies? passions?
Most importantly… what is your story? After all, your wedding will be a celebration of that love story. Your wedding should reflect your uniqueness…
There is no such thing as a set formula; one size does not fit all! And you do not want generic! When it comes to planning your wedding, you only get one shot to do it. And you can do it WELL…more than well… you are aiming for fabulousness!
If you are still feeling stuck, our company presents wedding planning workshops called “Splendid Wedding Planning Workshop”, drop us an email and we will send you an invitation ;)
(info@splendidaffairs.co.za)
GOOD LUCK
Why dont you hire a wedding coordinator to assist you with the wedding arrangements. They are pro’s and will make your life so much easier
We could have been BFF, Best Friends Forever.
I felt like that 7 months ago, with no money, no ideas, and no one to talk to…
My wedding is 2 months from now. I only decided on a venue this weekend, after moving the date 7 times, and the venues I wont even talk about.
My advice to you is, forget about what other people do, and be YOU, just you. Go and wear a million dresses. Try diffrent styles and colours.
And let me tell you, the heart wants what the heart wants. I live in PTA and is marrying in Durban, which my best friend said, is a logistical nightmare, but Im loving it.
Good Luck
Mizz Sunflower,
I know EXACTLY where you’re coming from. I had a massive blackhole in the part of my head where my little girl wedding dreams should be. I was, until recently, up to my ears in eager friends and relatives asking questions I didn’t have answers to and making suggestions I hated and telling me to get a move on and make some decisions… groan. I very seriously considered a trip to the local registry office just to get it over and done with! (If my better-half-to-be wasn’t so terrified of what his mom would have to say about it I think that would have actually happened)
Two things got the ideas flowing - the first was realising that with all my future bridesmaids overseas they are going to need to buy dresses without me present and so I needed a colour that was practical and understood anywhere, - and the second was finding a handful of porcupine quills scattered around my mom’s farm while I was out walking one day. It got me thinking about how different my guy and I are, much like the contrast of black and white in my hands. And yet the differences between us seem to make the best parts of each of us shine. That was it for me, colour-scheme was decided and everything seemed to flow from there.
Don’t lose heart, that one little thing will come along and you’ll find your path.
Best of luck and many happy glasses of wine to you :)